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I feel like a loser lately. Everything just slipped through my fingers, buttery. I am afraid of death, but not really of my own. I just hate feeling alone, to go back to square zero. Doubts creeping into my mind, ears are their door. 'Talents'? Do I even have something that latent? I used to think that this is fine, as I could see things up ahead. Everything is going to be well right? What good it is though, when I didn't realize that I was standing on bodies my dear comrades. I realized how short I am, after all I'm actually 5'3. It's not that I didn't expect bodies, it's just that I can't accept it. Everyone deserve to see what's beyond the horizon for them, why am I the only one left standing? Why are they under my feet? I shouldn't hate Death, it is just something we all will go through. I guess I just wanted something to blame, what a sore loser huh. I don't hate spiders but Death is one. We all are in its web, stuck in the net-work. It's creeping onto all of us, wrapping us with  Cocoons of Despair. In the cocoon, Poison of Suffering will be injected. It is melting your very existence. What's left now is for it to suck you very life out. 

I am so sorry, my negativity is being dominant right now. I am just tired, I think. Can't sleep, dull senses. My heart keeps beating, that's good right? Wait, isn't quite fast? My eyes can still see colours, but why am I looking at only grey? Why can't I turn my head? My ears are always occupied, as it fully wakes up when my eyes are closed. Sight of black, and the whispers of the dead came. The new voices are quite loud, I remember who they were. I don't want to cover my ears like a kid, but that's what I am doing now. I can't even listen to advices now. My nose? I can still smell. My own stench is nothing but I wonder. Why is my breath shorter, why is it getting hard to breathe? 

"Son, were you involved in any heavy impacts? Maybe you fell playing football? Your respiratory system got shifted, colds must be hard on you"

My tongue? I can still taste food, they are great. They are delicious... why can't I enjoy them though. Why, with all the flavours, I can't seem to taste the most important thing; joy. My skin is as functional as ever, I can feel the cold going deep. Winter will never be here so why is it so cold? I love the tropics, The Sun warmed us up. Look at our colours, we are warm people! What's with this blizzard then, imprisoning my heart? 



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