I think the lions share of advice has already been said by wiser and more articulate people than myself but I guess i can chip in on one part of your vent.
I think it's commonplace for people to end up in situations where you are with someone who ends up feeling they need space from your attention and it can feel awful when all you want to do is be affectionate and having your feelings return the opposite response and i think for a lot of people our natural defense to that is to draw ourselves away drastically in an attempt to "give them space" and this actually just makes you feel worse, because now you feel you cant talk to them and heck why do things have to be this way??? but from my experience attempting to remove yourself just pushes them away further. I don't really know the kind of people you are friends with but i find the best approach is to take it in your stride, still be social but identify which of your actions might be what is smothering the person you care about and try to cut back on that specifically and stay social, they will respect you for it if they are cool.
Anyway i hope my advice is still relevant to your life and if you're keen to talk about things or discussing lonely thoughts some time I'm good for it.